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Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to [listen] hear, slow to speak, slow to anger (James 1:19).

Nội dung chính

    What Does It Mean To Be Slow To Speak?Knowing When To Be Slow To Speak11 Ways To Be Slow To Speak#1 To be slow to speak means we let the other person express themselves#2 We thank the other person for being willing to talk with us.#3 Quick to listen and slow to speak means we are not offended when someone disagrees with us or corrects us#4 We dont focus on HOW the person expresses themselves, and make that an excuse for not listening#5 To be quick to listen means we are slow to make excuses, slow to defend ourselves, slow to contradict, slow to give our opinion#6 To be quick to listen means we try to be humble#7 To be quick to listen means we genuinely want to try to understand what the other person is saying#8 We realize that even if we disagree there are things we can learn by listening to them#9 To be quick to listen means we remember that we have blind spots#10 When we share our thoughts, we share them with gentleness and without anger#11 To be quick to listen means we trust Gods timingLess Wrangling, More ListeningVideo liên quan

Dont you just hate it when people disagree with you?

When someone tells you that youre wrong about something?

Dont you hate the feeling when someone says, Would you mind if I share something with you? Or when your wife says, Can we talk about? Or someone just blurts out, Im sorry I just dont see it that way.

Why is it that in this fallen world, everyone cant see that Im always right?

What Does It Mean To Be Slow To Speak?

So what does it mean to be quick to hear and slow to speak?

Heres a concise definition:

To be quick to hear and slow to speak means having both humility and respect for others. It means you take the necessary time to listen to people instead of just speaking your opinion.

Knowing When To Be Slow To Speak

James 1:19 can help us be slow to speak to many situations:

A fellow believer confronting you or disagreeing on a point of doctrine, or expressing an opinion on how to educate children, or any number of issues.

This verse addresses conflicts of every kind: marital conflicts, conflicts work, church conflicts.

It applies to conflicts with unbelievers as well.

It speaks to those times when someone shares with us a struggle theyre having and a quick and easy solution pops into our head. We want to stop them mid-sentence and say, Wait! No need to keep on detailing your struggle. Just trust God! There you go! End of discussion.

Have you ever noticed how, in almost every situation, when we quickly speak whatever is on our minds, it doesnt go well?

It simply doesnt help people.

Have you ever solved a problem in your marriage by being the dominant voice?

Has it ever been effective when you immediately fire back when your someone corrects you?

What about in a meeting work? Does it make people more productive when you shoot down all their ideas?

There is beauty and power in being slow to speak. It transforms relationships and allows us to hear the Holy Spiritspeak to usbefore we speak to others. In other words, when we wait to respond to someone, it gives the Spirit time to prompt us on what to say.

11 Ways To Be Slow To Speak

#1 To be slow to speak means we let the other person express themselves

We dont interrupt. We hold our thoughts and give them time to finish. It means we try to be slow to share our opinion or thoughts on a matter and wait until the other person has had plenty of time to share their thoughts.

Frankly, this should be common sense. If were going to truly understand a person and honor them properly, we should always let a person fully express themselves. When we dont, we cant even respond properly.

#2 We thank the other person for being willing to talk with us.

Some people find it very hard to disagree with, contradict or share a different perspective with others. Sometimes this is due to their personality. Or they have had bad experiences with spiritual abuse. Or maybe theyre simply shy by nature.

Over the years many people told me they were fearful of talking to me because I was a pastor. So I wanted to try to do all I could to make it easy for people to bring things to me, even if it was something I need to be addressed on.

#3 Quick to listen and slow to speak means we are not offended when someone disagrees with us or corrects us

This one can be really hard when it comes to being quick to listen and slow to speak. It is so easy to take things personally. Our internal personal defense lawyer immediately yells, Objection! the moment someone disagrees. Most of the time this is simply due to our pride.

We need to be able to step back and remember that disagreement or correction isnt necessarily an attack on us as a person. This is not someone being disloyal to us.

#4 We dont focus on HOW the person expresses themselves, and make that an excuse for not listening

Its so easy, when someone comes to us in anger or frustration, to write them off because of their delivery and not listen to what they have to say. At times like this, we really need to pray for the fruit of the Spirit for patience, love, and grace not to respond in kind.

We need the help of the Holy Spirit to be slow to speak and quick to listen.

#5 To be quick to listen means we are slow to make excuses, slow to defend ourselves, slow to contradict, slow to give our opinion

We want to defend ourselves because were proud. We dont like to think we have weaknesses. And we really dont like it when others see our weaknesses.

But listen. Dont say anything. Youre never going to improve in your life if you cant admit you have needs to grow and improve and see things you may not have seen yet.

#6 To be quick to listen means we try to be humble

A humble person doesnt think he knows or sees every issue perfectly. A humble person can learn from anyone.

If were humble, we understand that God has givenevery personunique gifts and insights that we dont have. Like us, they too are a temple of the Holy Spirit, being led and guided by God himself. In order to grow in our relationship with God, we need to benefit from those gifts and insights.

#7 To be quick to listen means we genuinely want to try to understand what the other person is saying

This means we really want to try to see the issue from their perspective. Only God has the perfect perspective on all issues.

Only God understands every issue completely. Only He knows the motives of mens hearts. Only God understands his Word absolutely perfectly.

Our perspective may be right but it could also be wrong or imperfect.We consider that we may really need to hear the other person. That they may be right, even if we cant see it right now.

#8 We realize that even if we disagree there are things we can learn by listening to them

Even if we only learn that others see the issue differently than we do. Even if we learn how someone else struggles with an issue that we dont struggle with. Even if we learn how we might help someone.

When were slow to speak, it allows us to understand other people more effectively. To gain a fuller knowledge of what it means to be a Christian.

#9 To be quick to listen means we remember that we have blind spots

We all have things we are blind to, areas we need to grow in, things we dont realize about ourselves. Remember how David asked God to send brothers to rebuke him? David considered that a blessing.

Let a righteous man strike meit is a kindness; let him rebuke meit is oil for my head; let my head not refuse it. Psalm 141:5

#10 When we share our thoughts, we share them with gentleness and without anger

For some reason, we tend to think that if we speak forcefully or with anger, theyll come around to our perspective. We forget that James says that anger does not bring about the life God requires.

However, when we believe that only God can open their eyes to see your perspective, it allows us to speak with gentleness. If God really wants someone to see something he can make it happen.

#11 To be quick to listen means we trust Gods timing

We dont have to win the argument now. We can share our perspective, then leave it up to the Lord to show them our side. That might not be during the current discussion. We both may need time to consider each others perspective.

Less Wrangling, More Listening

William Gurnall helpfully said:

Its not easy to be quick to hear and slow to speak. But the Lord can help us! Now get out there and listen! And please dont disagree with, confront or correct me.

Read Next:

    How To Understand The Bible: 21 Simple Methods To Help You Read More EffectivelyIn-Depth Guide: How To Choose The Best Study Bible16 Powerful Prayers For Children That God Loves To AnswerWhat Exactly Is Calvinism (and Why Im Not A Jerk)

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